Even before I met Cory I always had a fear of being in a marriage, but still being a “single parent.” So after we met, married and decided to start a family there was still a fear that even though I found a partner who I thought would be involved in our daily lives might not always be available to help with children or household chores. Especially a partner who was an entrepreneur. Cory was only 3 years into his business when we met and it has grown every year since. That takes a lot of work and dedication.
We talked A LOT. Before we were pregnant, during pregnancy and after. I still had worries and concerns and thankfully he always listened. For us it was all about me being open enough to share what I was afraid of and what was holding me back from truly being open to having kids. This really was a sticking point for me. He really really wanted kids and I really really didn’t want to do it alone.
He was and is busy all the time. I really struggled with being selfish…wanting his time but also understanding the business is important to us, and those who work with and for him.
What I did to help alleviate some of my own stress was only ask him to come to appointments during pregnancy I really wanted him there for and the routine mundane ones to do alone. That was a great compromise for me. He knew that I was doing it that way, so when I asked he would make the necessary arrangements to be there with me. I still do this. Our son was born with Hip Dysplasia. As you can imagine, there were a lot of doctors appointments to go to. If I am being honest here, there were many that it would have been nice to have Cory with me, but ultimately at some of those he wasn’t needed. I felt his time was better spent working on his business than sitting in a waiting room with me. Other times I wanted him there and he always was.
I was the primary caregiver for the first several years of our kids lives, but most days I couldn’t tell. Before we started our family I was the cook of the family. It was always (and still is) something I enjoy. But while I was pregnant Cory got up earlier and made breakfast every day. He took that upon himself. He still carries out that tradition 4+ years later. Waking up with the kids in the morning, letting me sleep in or shower and we all get a hot breakfast together at the table.
There are still nights where he needs to work late, or go in early. I try to always be understanding when he does and he always tries to go above and beyond for our family. Just this morning he needed to be out the door by 7:15 and he still made breakfast for me and the kids before he left! That dedication he has to us is definitely what keeps us going strong and working towards each others goals and our mutual goals.
Another thing we have started just in the last year or so is when he has to be gone for business for 3 or more days at a time. He spends a half day before or after the trip with me or me and the kids. He takes the time out of the office and we just do something fun. It has really changed the way I look at his business trips. He has to be gone from us so he gives us just a little bit extra.